Travel Tips for Women
Disclaimer: Some of these travel tips for women may give the impression that India is full of men ready to sexually assault you given half a chance. In fact, like anywhere, it’s a small minority on the whole, though some cities, such as Delhi, have a worse reputation even amongst locals, than others. Use these tips and hopefully you’ll keep out of trouble. Theses travel tips for women are especially appropriate for younger women of ‘marriageable age’. When I first started visiting India I was just twenty years old and had to ward off a few grabby men. In my last few visits (many years later), I’ve not had to worry about any attention unwanted or otherwise, oh, except on the full-on-Delhi metro...which brings me to tip #1! Travel Tips for Women #1 - Avoid the Delhi MetroIt seems all the sexual frustration of the city is unleashed in there—you have been warned. It’s soooo packed with people and it’s hard to prove that a wandering hand or the close body contact are intentional, so be careful or use a different method of transport. The crush to get in and out of the metro carriages is also particularly unpleasant, so I wouldn’t recommend using it unless you absolutely have to, unless of course, you like a bit of overly-friendly contact with the locals?Travel Tips for Women #2 - Be aware of cultural prejudiceThere are of course, many Indian people who are well educated, have traveled widely and are familiar with the West. But for the majority of less sophisticated Indians, especially in rural areas, their knowledge of Western culture is almost exclusively based on TV shows such as Desperate Housewives, Sex in the City and Baywatch reruns. When Western women turn up in skimpy cargo shorts and body hugging white singlets, showing lots of skin, the assumption is you will act like someone on one of these shows. It’s funny, but even when I first went to India and visited extremely poor city areas, not much more than slums, every home had a TV and radio, even if they had almost nothing else!Just being aware that this is the filter through which you may be seen, could help you to avoid getting into any unwelcome situations.
Travel Tips for Women #3 – Dress AppropriatelyIt is basic manners to dress according to local sensibilities. It’s a little tricky to say exactly how far to go, so I’d say there are two things to keep in mind. The first is the cultural prejudice mentioned above, so if this is not the impression you want to give, err on the side of more demure outfits. The second is be guided by what you see locals around you wearing. In general, to dress appropriately, long trousers/jeans or ankle length skirts are the norm, with tops which are loose, rather than figure-hugging. In more sophisticated parts of the cities, you’ll find women wearing more Western clothing, skimpier tops etc, so you can relax a little more here, but always being aware that you will be judged differently from local women. Cleavage and showing bra straps is a no-no, as are sleeveless tops on the whole.In regional areas, I dress in Salwaar Kameez as much as possible, mostly because it’s an outfit that’s both elegant and comfortable, no mean feat!
Travel Tips for Women #4 - Avoid eye contact with menThis may seem a little extreme, so just take it with a grain of salt. But this was something I was taught when I first went to India as a young adult, and I was living in a regional city in a Muslim community. Somehow it stuck and I now find this natural. And clearly, along with wearing appropriate clothes, my friends and I were seen as ‘not from around here’, however, since we had blue or green eyes, we overheard other women discussing that we were most likely from Kashmir, so at least we passed for sub-continental!Also, staring does not seem to be impolite, so you will be stared at from time to time because you are different. Get used to it!
Travel Tips for Women #5 - Keep basic personal security in mind at all timesThis is general advice for traveling anywhere, doubly so if you’re traveling alone. Keep your wits about you, keep your valuables close, don’t attract attention with flashy shows of wealth and trust your instincts. If something feels a little unsafe, take steps to get yourself out of that situation straight away. Pretend you don’t understand the accent, feign illness, whatever works. Avoid traveling alone at night, especially and keep to reasonably populated streets.Travel Tips for Women #6 - It’s acceptable to fight back if requiredOk, this is where the law of the jungle works both ways. Just say someone does manhandle you, it’s perfectly acceptable to take matters into your own hands. For example, on my first trip to India, I was walking a little ahead of my group of friends, so it seemed that I was alone. A young man was also walking along, moved over close and then had a grab at my breast. Luckily I knew the drill and I yelled out and whacked him as hard as I could. I have to say it was very therapeutic to be able to hit back. The other good thing is that most Indian men are of reasonably slight build, which means it’s not hard to give as good as you get.A different time, though, one guy proved too quick for me. It was about 10am and I was walking along a market street with some friends, when I got pinched on the butt. When I tried to hit back, I was too slow, as the enterprising guy was on a bicycle and was already half way up the street! It’s prudent to note that on both these occasions, I was dressed appropriately, was not traveling alone and I’m not even blonde. And the guy rubbing up against me in the metro tube was doing so in full view of my husband, though trying to make it seem like it was just the train jostling him, yeah right. So these tips will help somewhat, but it’s best to expect that anything could happen.
Travel Tips for Women #7 - Avoid Public Displays of AffectionIt’s not usual for men and women to display affection in public, but you will probably see same-sex affection such as men holding hands, gazing into each other’s eyes etc. The first time I went to India, I was surprised to see what I thought was such overt homosexuality in a country which didn’t even allow men and women to kiss on screen, but eventually I understood that people get their affection where they can and since male-female displays of affection are frowned upon, it’s deemed ok for same-sex friendships to involve physical affection in public.Travel Tips for Women #8 – Blondes don’t have more funBlonde girls stick out a mile in India, so you will get stared at more often, possibly in some parts of the country where there are less tourists, people may even want to touch your hair. I have a blonde friend who is freaked out by this and is considering dyeing her hair dark before she goes. I think that’s a little extreme, but whatever works! Other options include wearing a dupatta (scarf) over the head, or alternatively, just enjoy feeling like royalty or a zoo exhibit, depending on your perspective!Travel Tips for Women #9 – Going to the BathroomIt can be tricky to find a bathroom when you need one sometimes in India. In the words of my friend Kara, when the whole country is a men’s toilet, where should the women go? Here’s a suggestion that works for us—the ladies room in five star hotels. Try to look like you belong, even if you don’t. I have to say that the Imperial hotel near Connaught Place in Delhi has saved me more than once. This bathroom actually is so beautiful and luxurious, it’s a little slice of heaven. Actually, there are now a few more clean and modern public conveniences than there used to be, but they’re still pretty rare.Travel Tips for Women #10 - Shop ‘til you dropI love shopping for clothes and shoes, but in India, I have to be careful. I’m an average size person (both clothes and shoe size) in the West, but in India, I’m super-sized. When I want to buy a pair of shoes in India, they usually have to send someone up to the storage area for the extra-extra-extra large sizes. The average size in India would be the smallest size sold in my country. So don’t necessarily expect to be able to walk into any shop and buy extra pieces, especially if you’re on the larger side of average in the West, though as India becomes more affluent with big name Western brands having a presence there, it’s a little easier than it used to be. But if you’re on the small side, you’ll be shopping til you drop.The rest of us can find plenty of homewares to satisfy those shopping cravings in any case, and pashminas are one-size fits all :-)
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